Backyard breezes...

(the following is an excerpt from today's journal entry)

It was a really hot, bright, sunny day today - my 9th day here in Uruguay - but the breeze in Anna Ruth's backyard, as the sun begins to set, is very refreshing.  It's the perfect spot for me to be as I let the tension and tiredness of the day slide off of me.

Too much chaos...  too much uncertainty... too much new... too much feeling like the outsider...  Add to that my sister's knee surgery and John's pacemaker replacement procedure back in Pennsylvania today and the emotional drain got the best of me.  Tears spring readily to my eyes and spill onto my cheeks.  Sadness is the descriptive word for the day.

I stepped into Matt & Toni's life here in Montevideo in the midst of an incredibly busy season for them (list of specifics follows).  And then there's me... plopped in the middle of it all...  hating to need anything from anyone...  yet being more needy than I like to admit in this time of transition...

I'm not a child...  I've been through this kind of change numerous times before in my life... but that doesn't take away the disoriented, displaced feeling that I'm currently experiencing - it explains it but it can't make it go away.

And so here I am...  sitting in Anna Ruth's backyard...  enjoying the quiet space and the breeze...  listening to the wind chimes...  and letting the emotions flow.

Tomorrow will be a new day...  the sun is expected to shine brightly again...  my emotions might get the better of me again... but there is sure to be a refreshing breeze to be found in the backyard.

Thank You, God, for backyard breezes... for quiet moments with You...